Nonviolent Communication by Marshall B. Rosenberg is a work that offers an effective process of communication that resolves conflict and centres around compassion and empathy. The main points that you will gain from this book are as follows:
- A lot of conflict and disagreement can be resolved and avoided by implementing the 4-step NVC (nonviolent communication) process while interacting
- The 4-step NVC process: observe the situation, assess your feelings, identify your needs, identify the concrete actions we request in order to enrich our lives
- Communication that blocks compassion: moralistic judgements, making comparisons, and denial of responsibility
- How to observe a situation without casting judgement
- How to properly identify and express our feelings thereby experiencing emotional liberation
- How to appropriately make a request that will enrich our lives (and resolve a problem)
- Distinguishing between requests and demands
- How to listen and respond to another person with empathy and foster a strong connection with them
- The power of empathy: how it heals and defuses danger
- How to connect compassionately with ourselves: self-forgiveness and self-awareness
- A 4-step method for expressing our anger fully and safely
Is This Book For You?
Yes. Absolutely. This book is for everyone. Because everyone interacts with people, everyone encounters conflict and everyone has the right to educate themselves on how to communicate effectively in a way that will strengthen rather than weaken relationships.
Did you ever find yourself in a situation in which another person was very sad, or very angry and you wish that you knew how to respond to them in a way that would take away their pain? That is exactly what the chapter on empathy will show you how to do.
Did you ever find yourself reacting with extreme anger and aggressiveness to someone’s behaviour towards you, and you felt helpless to control your emotions and understand why you felt that way?
The information in the chapter about connecting compassionately with ourselves will give you the tools for identifying and resolving the inner conflicts that are the real cause of our emotional responses.
This is one of the most useful works that I have EVER read. Given my obsession with personal development material, that’s saying a lot! It gets a 10/10 purely because of its utter usefulness and how essential it is for everyone.
Keep in mind that Nonviolent Communication is more of an instruction manual for being an epic communicator rather than a usual non-fiction work that solely focuses on a certain argument and then will maybe provide some real life practical tips for making use of the information.
This entire book is practical methods and tools that one can immediately implement to further enrich their relationships and instantly resolve conflict.
It also provides segments where you can see the “NVC process in action”. Real dialogue and conversations that demonstrates the power and merit of compassionate communication.
I really believe that if everyone has read this book and practiced the principles of NVC families would be happier, organizations would be more productive, and even political conflict would significantly improve.
In fact, the NVC process was used as a mediating tool for meetings between the Israelis and Palestinians.
The most empowering aspect of this book is that it gives you the knowledge to be able to assess yourself without judgement, and to really understand the root causes of your emotions and thoughts. It teaches you a new way to perceive yourself that is loving and understanding.
Once you know how to regard yourself with compassion and love, it will come naturally to act this way towards others.
This method is so life-changing that I plan to teach it to my children. I am really that excited about it! NVC is a much needed work to show people how to act with the heart, and connect with the humanity within everyone.
If you have ever used the NVC process in your own life, leave a comment and let us know your results!